Learning to Embrace the Darkness

Admittedly I'm very impressed with myself for coming up with that title.  It will probably be the best part of the post!

I've been trying very hard lately to create a better relationship with the Prince of Darkness (the 8 year old).  This guy can be so hard to deal with, and is extremely self-centered.  If I say, "The world doesn't revolve around  you!" he will immediately come back with, "Yes it does!".  I have also gotten, "I command you!" and "I'm the king of this world!"  The Pod is a total control freak.  He always has been.  And it's root is anxiety.

For several years now I've found it nearly impossible to connect with the PoD.  Everything was a fight, a battle of wills, and boy, does this kid have a will.  He dominates his brothers (which is kind of funny, considering how small he is and how big Buddy is).  One time he made me cry, than he laughed at me and called me a crybaby. I've often thought that he didn't have a conscience.  He fights with me about things that aren't real.  We fought for months because he wanted me to peel his skin off so he could be a skeleton.  Really fought!  We've also argued about how horrible I am because I won't get him a time machine, or because I won't drop him off at the mountains so he can go climbing.  Things like this just really wear me down.  On the flip side, he can also be super hyper, and crazy insane silly.  There are two different boys in one tiny body, and they both drive me bananas.

Anyway, lately I've been trying to break down my issues with him.  I try to remember to praise him like crazy for the tiniest bits of positive behaviour.  I give him lots of hugs and kisses (when he'll let me).  I try to organize things so that he can be first (or at least have his choice of being first) for homeworks and bedtime (gotta be number one, right?).  I've also been trying hard to feed into his Star Wars fascination.  Budgets have been tightened to allow for rewards and posters and such to keep him happy.  I keep him a steady supply of food to keep his mood and blood sugar up (he's super weird about food.  He lives on garlic bread (with the crust peeled off), milk, and nutella on toast.  Sometimes he'll eat a strawberry or a grilled burger.  And popsicles.  I'm obsessed with his laxative meds (he gets super bad when he's constipated, but who wouldn't?).

It does help.  He does have a deep need for security and reassurance.  Inside the raving son of satan that he can be, he's a fragile little boy.  It doesn't hurt that he's as cute as sin!